Problems finding your G-spot?
Forget all theories about its location. And look at your man.
He rubs his when you give him a
They say a man's G-spot is in his rectum. And to arouse him, slide a finger up. This stimulates his prostate wall and will curl his toes.
Unless he thinks it gay.
Wait, you're a gal reading this?
If you're squeamish about anal, reach his heart through his stomach.
Everything stands erect when a man gets happy (pants).
The same goes for his gut. Men are that simple.
The difference between men and women is subtle. Women's sexual organ is their brain. Tantalizing foreplay, reassuring gestures, smooth talk and the woman squirts your bedroom into an aquarium.
Men have two heads but one brain. And they can't use both heads.
Truth is, a man rarely makes a woman climax.
No, women aren't hard to please. Men are just more easily satisfiable. Steak, a romp in the hay, and a snoring serenade is guaranteed. That applies to me, too. Except, unlike my Chinese pals, I don't eat pussy.
My life's changed since I embraced the size of my G-spot.
Nobody needs look for. It rests on my lap when seated. It's so big, my face and feet don't touch the bed. It's handy as the pillow skips a shower by my dinner-flavored goo. And the bed avoids velociraptor toenail scratches.
Size queens, if you saw my G-spot, you'd gag!
Like women's G-spot is believed to be bean-shaped, so is my gut — only vertical. In the mirror, I see a slim figure, with most of the gut "out of frame".
Even without Redbull, my G-spot has wings!
I asked my cousin to open the door, she mistook my love handle for the doorknob. She saw me shirtless, navel down to pubis, she thinks me a girl.
Truth is, more muffins penetrate my esophagus than trains enter tunnels. I so spoil my hairy G-spot with spicy treats that it is often drenched in such heat! Mom puts a bowl under me and uses the gathered sweat as vinegar.
Some salads we have!
But, I'm considering reducing my orgasms to a reasonable 4/day: breakfast, lunch, snack, dinner. Exercise looks good. But work out alone?
So, I'm looking for an e-workout partner. No one fancy. Just a guy who is gay, athletic, nutrition savvy, patient, with a charming smile and single.
Yes. That's code for "I'm looking for an Apollo of a boyfriend".
You heard me.
Recommend applicants and help me choose one?