tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post7874864269066933482..comments2023-03-26T09:02:31.583+01:00Comments on Gay Arab Guy: Precious and Mary Jones Lived HereWilmaryadhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05521844359441132973noreply@blogger.comBlogger53125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-65940966686730470462011-03-25T18:39:34.643+01:002011-03-25T18:39:34.643+01:00omgomg✔ Turk Gayshttp://twitter.com/turkgaysnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-65243858274590399942010-06-08T19:07:38.169+01:002010-06-08T19:07:38.169+01:00<3<3Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-65975815961993589302010-06-08T19:07:00.149+01:002010-06-08T19:07:00.149+01:00:o:oAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-15428755271957875412010-06-08T16:23:47.526+01:002010-06-08T16:23:47.526+01:00:o:oAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-14544705141788251262010-05-28T21:28:20.760+01:002010-05-28T21:28:20.760+01:00@ Dorothy: Mom has always had issues she refuses t...@ Dorothy: Mom has always had issues she refuses to acknowledge. The closest she gets to admitting that is by blaming everything on how life treated her. A bride at 20, a divorcee at 23, a bride again at 26, a widow at 27, and a beautiful trophy ever since.<br /><br />She, in no way, needed money to survive. Her pay was more than enough for a stingy mother and an undemanding son. She, however, always surrounded herself with indecent women who used her silly. Her sexcapades were to help get so-and-so out of prison, avoid military service to so-and-so ... but never for her.<br /><br />As for the violence to which she submitted me, she said the other day that it's because she didn't know any better. That it's how she was raised. I objected emphasizing how her parents never spat on her face, cut her wrist open with a big kitchen knife, splash her with pepper spray in her sleep, or kick her out of the house, barefooted, in the cold rainy winter, at the mere age of 6, in a neighborhood full of drug dealers and sexual predators.<br /><br />My mom made then broke me. It is the utter truth. Hugs*Wilmaryadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05521844359441132973noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-55905891766703355802010-05-27T02:37:24.030+01:002010-05-27T02:37:24.030+01:00Hmm...you know me...I have many thoughts triggered...Hmm...you know me...I have many thoughts triggered by your words...Your mother in your words... ``Mother is educated, independent and has always had men at her feet.``Then as I read on...your words seemed to change direction about your mother....``I believe mom holds a grudge against me because the men she wanted to marry must have had a problem with her having children.`` <br /><br />If she was truly as independent as you thought...she would not need a man to take care of her....if she was educated, she would have taken care of herself...<br /><br />Just maybe she was not as educated and independent as you thought her to be....maybe she really did have issues such as the mother of Precious. <br />Could it be that your dreams and reality have you confused to the point, that your hurts want you to hate your mother and not accept that maybe she really did need help. <br /><br />I am in NO WAY defending her ways or treatment of you at all...I am however reading between your thoughts and fears.<br /><br />You could also have been a deep seated reminder of own nightmares of having to give sexual favors for money...and or a memory of a certain man in her life.<br />SO many reasons lay behind why a mother chooses to punish her child.<br />There is no reason to dismiss the horrific actions and wrong doings...but there most certainly is a reason why they do it.<br /><br />For a victim to understand the reasons behind the abuse...it helps in many ways to set them free of the hate prison they find themselves in.<br />End the abuse that has taken up so many of your years and begin a life of freedom and move on in your thoughts.<br /><br />I leave you with a feeling of warmth from my arms holding your pain and taking it with me*Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03515108852664219576noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-61696712304217461442010-04-09T01:30:36.911+01:002010-04-09T01:30:36.911+01:00@ Linda: I agree. I have not read the book but wat...@ Linda: I agree. I have not read the book but watched the movie and did write this post the day after. Domestic violence is already horrible on its own; sexual abuse adds just more insult to injury. Thanks for stopping by!Wilmaryadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05521844359441132973noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-23779768460443099642010-04-08T18:31:55.392+01:002010-04-08T18:31:55.392+01:00Oh I've read a little of the novell Push and s...Oh I've read a little of the novell Push and seen the movie. Gosh it's so great, beautiful, sad and a eye opener. Poor precious.Linda Pochindahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11076455611734034775noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-50325454357771998012010-03-16T23:09:41.511+01:002010-03-16T23:09:41.511+01:00@ Story: She gave me reasons for being promiscuous...@ Story: She gave me reasons for being promiscuous i.e, to feed me, which was untrue because she had a job that paid more than enough to provide for 2 people. <br /><br />Her reasons for beating me to death are as unconvincing as the reasons she gave for traumatizing me by bringing men to the house. Supposedly, I always deserved the whipping and the spitting in the face. <br /><br />My mother always refuses to take the blame, especially not for causing me to grow too reserved, too withdrawn, too sensitive and too passive. She thinks I'm a useless, limp and worthless sack of rubbish.<br /><br />The beatings happened almost daily; whenever something didn't go her way with the men to whom she devoted her attention (relegating my need for a mom to the background), I was her punching bag. I often joke how I am the reason she does not have a wrinkle on her face at 50-something, but it's true. She never held back her fist or tongue to devalorize me.<br /><br />I'd lie if I said I am coping with that. I feel like a rootless tree miraculously standing ... but until when?Wilmaryadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05521844359441132973noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-79929691954139365392010-03-16T21:31:56.076+01:002010-03-16T21:31:56.076+01:00Wow. I almost skipped commenting on this because ...Wow. I almost skipped commenting on this because it is so hard to know what to say. All I kept thinking as I read your post was why did she do it? She gave you a reason... but how could she do it? Did she plan her acts of violence, or did she do it when she was in a rage? They are all useless questions, I suppose. What is important is you and how you are able to cope after going through what you have.<br /><br />That's really all I can think to say.Storyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13972384963627259685noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-58632911457371025372010-03-10T15:44:54.611+01:002010-03-10T15:44:54.611+01:00@ hitesh: Domestic violence and sexual abuse durin...@ hitesh: Domestic violence and sexual abuse during childhood are one of the secrets best kept by kids around the world. Call it fear of further punishment or shameful guilt for bringing this onto oneself, but a silent kid usually is a dormant volcano - a ticking bomb - in need of help not to explode and cause damage than can hardly be undone.<br /><br />Thank you for your support and insight.Wilmaryadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05521844359441132973noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-53465698378599048802010-03-10T15:40:18.546+01:002010-03-10T15:40:18.546+01:00@ Matthew: It is sad for me to say that I find sol...@ Matthew: It is sad for me to say that I find solace in not being the only one who's lived the atrocity of abuse in all its possible forms. At the same time, I wish nobody on earth would go through that, because it is unnecessary slowing down of the victim's ascension in life.<br /><br />In my case, domestic violence was more traumatic than sexual abuse. If my country had laws that banned parents from beating their kids, my mom would have been jailed 20+ years ago. But then, I'm sure I would have cowardly covered up for her just so she stays with me - something she rarely did.<br /><br />We can only come together to alleviate the weight of the burden we've been carrying mostly by ourselves all these years. My theory is that most, if not all, gay men have suffered abuse in their childhood, and it is one major reason their genetic predisposition got influenced.<br /><br />More on that soon. Thank you for taking the time to stop by and share your story, Matthew. I appreciate it! HugsWilmaryadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05521844359441132973noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-43378493105532150182010-03-10T15:30:07.609+01:002010-03-10T15:30:07.609+01:00@ Tony: Hello, my brother. Good to hear from you.
...@ Tony: Hello, my brother. Good to hear from you.<br /><br />I think Gabby didn't win not so much because of who she was up against but rather how she, from the get-go, showed that she was absolutely not the character she portrayed in the film. That's my theory.<br /><br />I am sorry to hear you, too, have been through sexual abuse as a child. As for those who think it can only happen in movies, you and I, as well as millions of molestation survivors, know better. Nothing more to add regarding the matter.<br /><br />You shed the light on a very important aspect of sexual abuse during childhood, which was going to be my next post, or one of the future posts: enjoying it despite it being morally wrong on the part of the abuser. Stay tuned.<br /><br />I connect with you on a much higher level now, knowing that we both went through identical scenarios. It saves lots of explaining. Big hug!Wilmaryadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05521844359441132973noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-41255185133258973422010-03-10T07:13:07.929+01:002010-03-10T07:13:07.929+01:00and good movie but really sad..... when i saw it ....and good movie but really sad..... when i saw it ...i could really feel for the poor girl.....<br /><br />but i thought that was fiction.....but reading you part ...you have suffered too......that's gives me feeling that i can't even describe in words......i haven't seen or heard like this around me, ever and may be that's the reason.....i can't feel wat u have been through.........<br /><br />don't want to sympathize cause that wouldn't be good to the courage you have shown to and fight you fought to get to the position you are rite now........Hitesh Rawathttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11445682649449414508noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-12407278220705260432010-03-09T00:30:30.441+01:002010-03-09T00:30:30.441+01:00Hello my sexy, sweet, and super-brilliant buddy O&...Hello my sexy, sweet, and super-brilliant buddy O' Mine!<br />It's me Matthew. I was just looking at your profile and loved the new photo of you looking down, open shirt, and you seem to be reflecting.... I like that intimate moment. So I wanted to quickly leave you a message, when I encountered this blog/post. ! Your writings always leave me literally and utterly emotionally stunned. I am overly busy at work, so I don't have time today to read all the comments. But I like this what Tony wrote: <br />"It’s strange how the victim can love and hate their assaulter at the same time. Part of you know that its wrong and the other part doesn't care! I always thought it was my fault. I thought that I had done something wrong because no just does stuff to you with you wanted it to happen; at least that's what he assured me. He used my trust and naiveté against me. So, GAG, I feel you! deeply!"<br /><br />That is poignant !! There are many many of us who have endured this and much worse. I entered foster care @ 10 years old, and I still to this day can't openly write about what I endured and witnessed before I turned 10 !!! Foster care in the early 70's wasn't much better. The first shocking reality was that I instantly was living in a home with others who had similar stories and experiences to mine and yours. SHOCKING how wide-spread. I am white; from a middle-class family.......dysfunction has no distinction of race, gender, or social status. You also know I did social work for 20 years and have seen and heard thousands of more similar stories, the sad reality.<br />Be strong my friend, we can never change the past, nor forget it (trust me) and movies like this will always re-open deep deep wounds.<br />You must, for your emotional and mental health forge forward !!! I know you know as you are 1000 times more intelligent than I. <br />Big hug from me to you my handsome brilliant writer !!! Remember you are not allowed to critique my writing.... I am at work, typing as fast as I can, as not to be discovered bogging on company time. Not grammar, sentence structure, nor spelling !!!<br /> All my love, I need to hold you tight for at least an hour, our souls will connect, and my powerful energy will diffuse much of what causes you pain. Trust me… not a veiled attempt to seduce, you. That you must realize as truth. Ciao amico, <br />MatthewAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-6095883945873606272010-03-08T09:58:48.654+01:002010-03-08T09:58:48.654+01:00Whats up GAG,
You know, I watched the Oscars toni...Whats up GAG,<br /><br />You know, I watched the Oscars tonight and I was happy that Monique won for best supporting actress. I knew that Gabby wouldn't win, considering who she was up against.<br /><br />Anyway, I saw the movie on opening day and it reminded me so much of what life was like in some black neighborhoods growing up! I felt the pain that she experienced and the power of those things crashing down upon her.<br /><br />I do think that the movie was brutal and real... I have heard some people say that the movie was all a figment and none of that could possibly happen to anyone!<br /><br />I almost got angry, but then I had to realize who the source was and remember that they're upper-upper middle-class and may not have had the same experiences!<br /><br />The Precious scenario is all to real for many people that can relate. I too was molested by a cousin when I was very young. The worst part of it all... I enjoyed it! I enjoyed it, because he gave me attention. It was wrong of him, but at least I felt like someone care if I existed or not. <br /><br />Its strange how the victim can love and hate their assaulter at the same time. Part of you know that its wrong and the other part doesn't care! I always thought it was my fault. I thought that I had done something wrong because no just does stuff to you with you wanted it to happen; at least that's what he assured me. He used my trust and naivete against me. So, GAG, I feel you! deeply! <br /><br /><br />-Tony.Tonyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07383056580959556159noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-24341765746839515492010-03-05T14:33:44.687+01:002010-03-05T14:33:44.687+01:00@ Anonymous: I am, by no means, insisting that I a...@ Anonymous: I am, by no means, insisting that I am Berber. I just am. :-) But I'm a few other things as well, so I can't claim North Africa to be all mine. ;-)Wilmaryadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05521844359441132973noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-71186726158045614962010-03-05T14:28:48.078+01:002010-03-05T14:28:48.078+01:00ah okah okAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-11308569202877763092010-03-05T14:24:41.469+01:002010-03-05T14:24:41.469+01:00@ Anonymous: Old-fashioned dating, to me, is the f...@ Anonymous: Old-fashioned dating, to me, is the fun and sexless process of getting to know a person.Wilmaryadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05521844359441132973noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-66416206891234739922010-03-05T14:23:34.128+01:002010-03-05T14:23:34.128+01:00hehehe..so definitely Kabyle cos only kabyles insi...hehehe..so definitely Kabyle cos only kabyles insist on that.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-83384315938379427732010-03-05T14:19:42.383+01:002010-03-05T14:19:42.383+01:00what do u mean by the old-fashioned way in ur prev...what do u mean by the old-fashioned way in ur prev. questionAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-44131114070340303862010-03-05T14:09:48.461+01:002010-03-05T14:09:48.461+01:00@ Anonymous: I agree that coming out would be usel...@ Anonymous: I agree that coming out would be useless and fatal. I, personally, am not hiding. I have severed ties with anybody gay-unfriendly or too flamboyant. While I have nothing against the latter (except maybe for attracting unnecessary and unwise attention in a conservative society), I don't wanna smile through the constant gay-bashing of the former.<br /><br />You sense I may be Berber? Well, of course I am. Aren't Berbers the original inhabitants of all of North Africa after all? ;)Wilmaryadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05521844359441132973noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-9539912798259962512010-03-05T14:00:15.182+01:002010-03-05T14:00:15.182+01:00what's the uses of comin out in here anyway:op...what's the uses of comin out in here anyway:opening another pain door,that's defending ur penchant while other people r doin it silently and peacefully...u can't hide ur entire life ,ur manners,ur tastes,ur hobbies speak out of u, people can tell....why do I sent that u'r kabyle?because u'r good or what?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-78102215058718008612010-03-05T05:28:33.410+01:002010-03-05T05:28:33.410+01:00@ Anonymous: Much of what you said sounds familiar...@ Anonymous: Much of what you said sounds familiar. I don't date, either. Not because I don't want to. But that's a different story.<br /><br />Why do you say people will find out you're gay in 5-10 years? Do you plan on doing the unthinkable and come out? :-)Wilmaryadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05521844359441132973noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3106215863106004643.post-41974195250202108952010-03-04T23:50:43.549+01:002010-03-04T23:50:43.549+01:00may b I'm less sexual (not cos I don't wan...may b I'm less sexual (not cos I don't want to but "u know"...). a man 4 me is confortable to stay with unlike women,thus I love cuddling,touching, staring in his eyes,in every ounce of his body even if theres no sex part(in my dreams of course).I don't date,I've never dated:my kind of man is very rare:a mature(up 2 50) man with a cute baby face.so even if there is 1 it's 99% straight ,or if he's gay,he acts the "matcho"to make it clear he's a "doer" not a "doee",lol. these r the men I've seen so far.generally I love in a "silent sef consuming mode".<br /> sorry I didn't get"do you date the old-fashioned way or go with the flow and end it with a quick romp in the sack?".<br /> in 5/10years I'll b 39/44 with a faint health,totally gray hair,many extra pounds,chances to settle down zero,always single,thinking aloud,querelling with my demented self aloud too,alone cos everybody found out...that's why I don't love anymore thank god..u got worms out of my nose,heah ?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com